Older women’s dating life tend to be the subject of scrutiny. If they’re spotted with a younger guy, tongues will wag, and eyebrows will raise. Filipinas are, unfortunately, not exempted from this unfair treatment. How dare they date someone instead of doing ordinary old lady things, right?
First of all, that reasoning is illogical. Older women are allowed to have their share of romance, even at late ages. Two, let people enjoy (unproblematic) things! Whether they’re having (legal) May-December affairs or enjoying the company of men their age and older, just let them be. It isn’t anyone’s business to meddle in her relationships.
Society expects Filipina women to become submissive wives and mothers once they reach certain ages and stages in their lives. Most twenty-something women usually get told by people to settle down and put a ring on it when they reach 30. Not only is that annoying—but it’s also downright disrespectful!
Nowadays, that perception is changing with the times. Even the older Filipina isn’t your stereotypical grandma lounging on the rocking chair.
What are we trying to say here? Dating older Filipinas isn’t boring at all! There’s more to them than their age, you know. How about we get to know them a little better?
Getting to Know the Older Filipina
What are older Filipinas like? Are they as dull as society depicts them?
Fortunately, the answer is no—they’re not! Older Filipino women are just as lively as their younger counterparts. Don’t expect them to be the typical tita (aunt or older female colleague) wasting away at her old age. Most of them are self-assured people, and that’s not just because of their ages.
Older Filipinas have the wisdom and experience that influence their confidence. They’ve been there and done that. Sneaking out in the middle of the night? Yes, they have! Secret flings? You bet! Attending power meetings as the big boss? Absolutely. Thanks to their personal and professional experiences, they know what they want and how they’ll get it.
You’ll be surprised at the things they’ve done and continue to do as they age gracefully. A good chunk of the country’s most influential people comprises (you guessed it!) older Filipino women. Older Filipinas have a seat at the table from the business world to retail because of their roles and contributions in their respective industries.
Age is really just a number, no?
Next time you spot one, never underestimate what she brings to the table. Now, speaking of spotting…
Where to Spot Older Filipinas
f you’re a guy looking for or who prefers older women, you’re in luck! Dating older Filipinas isn’t rocket science, and they aren’t that hard to find. The question is, where can they be found?
Older Filipinas are usually with their fellow titas or amigas (girl friends), hanging out on brunch dates while wearing classy outfits. If they’re not sipping coffee with friends during daylight, they’re at their favorite wine place, sharing a bottle of bubbly at night. So if you’re out and about with your friends, your chances of spotting them become more likely.
However, going out isn’t exactly a safe option nowadays. With COVID-19 showing no signs of stopping, don’t risk your health and life just to go out on a date. Fortunately, the internet has a solution for that.
Online dating is at an all-time high because everyone’s forced to stay indoors. Chances are, you’ll find an older Filipina looking for romance on the internet. Try dating apps or sites like TrulyFilipino to find your match!
You’ll never know who you’ll bump into online, and one of the people you’ll encounter may just be the one you’re looking for. Just remember to be polite while having a good time, okay? You don’t want to scare her off!
How Dating Older Filipinas Feel Like
Is dating older Filipino women any different from going out with younger ones? Honest answer: it totally depends on the pair. There’s no telling how far every relationship goes, and age may not be the clouding factor for the two of you. Everyone has their deal-breakers and nonnegotiables, and one can’t find out what they are until after dating somebody.
Since the woman’s older, don’t try to play mind games with her. You’ll just be wasting her time if you do, and she’s too mature for that—the last thing she needs is immaturity. As we said earlier, older Filipina women tend to know already what they want out at this point in their lives.
Be upfront without being crude and pushy. If you want to push her buttons, please be careful with your strategy! One wrong move will result in an ugly encounter (especially for her).
People WILL talk if you’re in a May-December relationship and the woman is the “December” (the older person). Some will say you’re just looking for a sugar mama, while others will (unfairly) label the woman as a cougar. It sucks, right? The stares and eyebrows don’t help much, either.
If you’re really into the person you’re dating, ignore the haters! They’ve got nothing going on in their life anyway and don’t know your story. As long as you two are head over heels with each other, all should be good. Why listen to people who have no clue about you two, right?
Fortunately, society’s slowly starting to come around to the thought. God forbid a Filipino woman past her twenties can’t have fun dating around, no?
Takeaways from Dating Older Filipinas
Dating is an educational experience. You two can learn a ton about and from each other for the duration of your relationship. With that said, what can one take away from dating older Filipino women? Here are a few nuggets of wisdom:
#1: Don’t give in to pressure
Filipino status quo paints older women in traditional roles, with religion and culture as the basis. Most expect them to play the family’s caretaker, staying at home to attend to familial obligations.
However, the mold’s reshaping nowadays: not every Filipina beyond their twenties is a settled-down married lady with kids. Many are still accomplished and active bachelorettes who are seasoned professionals in their chosen fields, gunning for higher goals with no signs of slowing down.
This should teach you not to cave in to your friends’, family’s, and society’s expectations of you. It’s YOUR life, after all—not theirs. You’re a grown adult who can make decisions for yourself just fine.
#2: If you’re going to take the plunge, know your reasons
Don’t be a jerk and start a committed relationship without a good reason. Friendly reminder: feelings aren’t toys! They don’t have a return & exchange policy either, so please don’t string along and mess with someone’s emotions.
If you plan on going out with an older Filipina, you better know what you want. What are you in it for? Is it just a casual affair, or are you looking for something more?
Aside from being a fun experience, dating is a character and confidence builder as well. As you two get to know each other, you’ll learn a lot about yourself in the process. If you two aren’t the endgame, you’ll know better the next time you start dating someone else.
#3: Love will look for you
Does this sound cliche? Yes. However, it does ring true. As much as you try to find your one true romance, it doesn’t come to you when and how you want it.
Friendly advice: don’t chase love. The more you look for it, the more it’ll hide from you. What you can do is not let reality pass you by as you search for the one. Enjoy your life! You only have one to live, so why not savor it? You’ll never know when love hits, so don’t hesitate to stop and smell the roses while you can. Just be patient, okay?
#4: Commitment isn’t for the faint-hearted
Committing yourself to someone is a big deal. Think of it as an investment: instead of money, you’ll need to pour in time, effort, and feelings to make things work. So if you don’t plan on anything long-term, spare your match the pain. Let her know from the jump!
If you have boundaries, set them straight to avoid disasters. Have you got commitment issues? Don’t string the poor woman along! Just because you’re afraid of long-term relationships doesn’t mean you get to lead someone on and hurt her feelings. Fix yourself first before finding solace in someone else.
Setting terms and boundaries help temper expectations and avoid potential heartbreaks. Trust us—you don’t want an ugly ending.
Dating older Filipinas doesn’t deserve the stigma it gets. So, yes—age does not matter. One’s maturity and philosophies have little to do with that factor. Will there be challenges? Sure. Fortunately, they’re not impossible to conquer.
Just because you’re dating older Filipinas doesn’t mean it’ll end ugly for the both of you. Who knows—you two may be the pair that completes each other! If you two are happy together, then what’s the big deal, right?