Love is something that everyone wishes to experience at least once. However, not everyone is lucky enough to have it end happily—at least on the first try. Fortunately, you can always keep trying when it comes to love. But if you’re someone who is now facing dating in your 30s, you might be feeling really discouraged by your prospects, especially if younger people surround you.
If you don’t want to keep suffering rejections, you should learn all there is to know about relationships. There’s more to dating than enjoying each other’s company. It also involves getting to know someone and going through life together, all while making a few compromises here and there.
At the end of the day, your dating experience is unique to you and your partner. The best you can do is prepare, not only by learning through your experiences but also by reading more about it.
However, what if you have no experience to speak of? There’s no need to worry if that’s the case for you. If you’re a single who’s only started dating in your 30s, you’re doing it at the right time. That’s because dating at an early age ends poorly more often than not. Here are the main reasons why.
Ways A Relationship Can Go Wrong: Dating At An Early Age
1. He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not
People in their teens seek relationships for various reasons; they might be curious about it, or they want to have a significant other in their life. Now, neither is a wrong reason in itself, but it also means that they rarely take the time to get to know their partner at all.
Young singles might not find this an issue since they themselves are also busy exploring the feeling of first love. However, as you get older, it’s a given that you’d want to settle down with someone who likes you for you.
2. Left On Read
Life at 20 is full of opportunities and experimentation. It’s focused on your self-discovery and development. That’s why if you decide to date at an early age, you might not be able to give your partner the attention they want.
Of course, it doesn’t mean that dating at an early age is impossible—it’s just more difficult. You’ll need to make an effort to balance what you want with what your partner wants from the relationship and try to find a balance in between. Not everyone can make that work, which is why some couples end up breaking it off.
3. The Extra Mile
Many things go into maintaining a relationship—time, effort, and resources, to say the least. You also need to know how to communicate properly and learn about your partner. It’s a lot to dive into, which is why most couples that date at an early age have a higher chance of breaking up.
Young adults and singles new to love are sorely inexperienced when it comes to love. The relationships they have in this time are likely to be rocky, although not always. If they don’t learn to grow and adjust as a partner, then breaking up is only a matter of time.
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What It’s Like Dating In Your 30s
We don’t mean to say that seeing success when dating at a young age is impossible. However, it’s not exactly a walk in the park, either. Not everyone is equipped to handle what relationships require at this age, which is why breakups are more likely to happen.
Fortunately, trying to find The One isn’t restricted to a certain period of time. Chances are, you’re going to find that special someone when dating in your 30s. Here are a few reasons why.
1. Crystal Clear Feelings
In your 30s, you have a better idea of what you’re looking for in relationships. You’ve been through a lot of things at this point, so you’ve had a lot of time to grow into your skin. Some are looking to settle down, while others are looking to keep things casual. No matter your preference, what matters is that you have a definite idea of what you want.
If that’s not the case for you, then there’s no need to worry. People grow at their own pace. If you still don’t know what kind of relationship you want, then you might want to take the time to figure it out first. You have a lot of time and resources to do so, after all, especially if you’ve been focusing on advancing your career.
2. Busy Bee No More
Most people in their 20s focus on building their careers and finding what they want to do in their lives. That doesn’t give them much time or energy to focus on their relationship. Not everyone can balance their personal life with romance as well.
Singles in their 30s are likely to be in a more stable position in their work. They have more time to pursue what they want in life, may it be hobbies or romance. Also, you’ll have the resources to do so without worrying about your budget.
3. Swimming In Green
With a flourishing career comes a more stable financial status. Affluent singles tend to have more successful dating lives. While money isn’t everything, you can’t deny that someone with money is more appealing as a partner. It is a bit materialistic, to be sure, but also necessary if you consider that everything you need to live comes at a price.
Financial stability is also important to consider for the future, especially if you plan to settle down. You’ll need to support not only yourself but also your partner once you get married. If you’re planning to have kids, that’s also something you should prepare for by setting aside as much money as you can. With a better financial status, you can save money more easily.
You’ll also have more enjoyable dates if you have the room to spend more—no need to worry about small budgets or check prices.
4. Living Like Royalty
Date nights for couples in their 30s aren’t easy when compared to when you were younger. You won’t have as much time as you used to, thanks to your job, social life, and other commitments, if you want to keep the sparks alive, making each date enjoyable and memorable counts.
Fortunately, that won’t be much of an issue if you’re dating in your 30s. Most singles at that age usually have a reliable source of income and stable finances. Splurging on the occasional extravagant date won’t have you worrying about your budget for other necessary expenses.
5. Stop, Look, Listen
Most people think that fights are the reason a relationship ends. However, that isn’t always the case. Arguments in a relationship aren’t unavoidable, but that doesn’t mean that they signify the couple’s bad times. Fighting is another way a relationship grows — as long both parties know how to communicate.
People in their 30s have a better idea of communicating properly since they’ve learned to do so over the years. While that doesn’t guarantee that the singles you meet at that age are all proficient at communicating, it does reduce the chance that your partner will get carried away by their emotions during disagreements.
6. Wealth of Experience
No one is born an expert in relationships. Instead, they gradually learn more about it as they grow and undergo more experiences in life. Whether they were happy or sad, the relationships in your teenage years help you learn about the intricacies of human relationships.
Dating in your 30s won’t feel as confusing, thanks to the wealth of experience you’ve acquired in your youth. While it won’t help you avoid rejections entirely, it should at least increase your chances of finding the perfect partner for you.
One of the important things you should have learned by now is that you don’t need to settle for less. Since you have a better idea of the type of relationship you want and the kind of person you want to be with, you’ll be able to seek out a partner that fulfills both. Your future relationships won’t feel like you’re fumbling around and finding what feels alright anymore.
Tips for Over-30 Singles
Dating in your 30s isn’t actually as difficult as you think. However, one of the problems you might encounter is dates, particularly the lack of it. You might want to consider using dating apps and websites if you haven’t already.
Online dating can help you make more matches, but that doesn’t guarantee success in finding love. If you keep these tips in mind, though, then you’ll be able to have a better dating online experience.
1. Outside the (Check)Box
Everyone has their ideal partner, and we know you aren’t an exception. However, that doesn’t mean that you should strictly adhere to those standards to the T. You might be surprised that if the next match you give a chance will be the one that makes you happy—even if they don’t check all the boxes.
If you’re evaluating a potential match, you might want to try focusing on avoiding those with your relationship deal-breakers. Otherwise, it would be best to keep an open mind and try matching with people that seem interesting for you, preferences aside.
2. The Person Beyond the Screen
Online dating comes with the expectation that the people you match are guaranteed to be compatible with you. However, you’d be surprised to know that that isn’t always the case. Common interests and preferences aren’t the only things that are important in a relationship. Chemistry matters as well, but that’s something you can only figure out if you actually try to get to know your match.
Besides asking the usual questions about your match’s life, such as their family, work, and interests, you should also ask questions that you genuinely want to know the answers to. It can help further the conversation naturally while giving the impression that you’re truly interested in your match.
3. Meeting Face-to-Face
Once you’ve hit things off with your match, it would be best to start making plans to meet offline. Dating apps and websites may have been how you’ve met your match, but that doesn’t mean that you have to stay there.
Always remember that online dating only serves as a way to connect people looking for romance. If you want to have a deeper relationship, meeting offline is an inevitable part of the process. However, you should make sure that you’re both comfortable with the idea before you get carried away with the idea of seeing each other face-to-face.
Dating in your 30s can feel like an impossible task, especially if you’re inexperienced with romance. However, one thing you should remember is that you’re not alone. There are many singles out there who are trying to find love in their 30s. You might not have gone through the same experiences, but the struggles of dating in one’s 30s remain similar.
If the rejections are starting to feel like they outweigh the positive dates, you should remember that age is just a number. As long as you stay open to new experiences and avoid focusing on your age, finding love will happen sooner than you think. In the meantime, you should make the most of life and enjoy all that it has to offer—with or without a significant other.