How young is too young?
We all know about the relationships formed between older men and younger women. In fact, it’s so common that it’s bled its way into popular culture. But have you ever thought about the inverse—a younger man dating an older woman?
Though these age-gap relationships were once viewed as rare chances of love, more women than ever today are now choosing to date men much younger than themselves. Some people claim that age isn’t just a number when it comes to love. But before you consider crossing the age difference, consider the positive, the negative, and the complicated aspects of dating a younger man.
Why Date Younger Men?
According to Susan Winter, co-author of Older Women, Younger Men: New Options for Love and Romance book, mature and successful men are used to being in charge of a woman. On the other hand, young men have grown up around working women and have even likely worked under female managers, so they’re more understanding of strong and in-charge women.
Anyone who has dated a younger man will tell you that it is exciting being wooed by somebody more youthful, but it also has many drawbacks. And more often than not, a lot of it will depend on how big the age gap is between you and a younger man.
Keep reading to learn the pros and cons of dating a younger man.
5 Pros of Dating A Younger Man
1. He’ll make you feel young again
You’re just as young as the people you hang out with! When you get older, some situations start to feel like you’ve “been there, done that.” But when you start dating a younger man, you’re able to view the world from his point of view. And all the things you thought you were tired of? They’ll suddenly seem new and inspiring again.
Being around a younger man than you will you back to those days when you had fewer worries. His energizing personality will rub off on you, and he’ll bring excitement and spontaneity into your relationship in ways that a more experienced man can’t.
You feel youthful once more, which is perhaps the most compelling motivation for dating a younger man.
2. You’ll be exposed to a new point of view
As you go through life, you form belief structures that are formed by your experiences. They narrow your viewpoint over time without you realizing it.
When you spend quality time with someone younger, you allow yourself to be exposed to new fresh ideas. He can make you aware of the importance of reassessing things in ways that inspire and motivate you.
He likely won’t be as skeptical as the more mature man who has been through heartbreak and misery. A younger man knows how to have fun, and is up for a wide range of adventures, like traveling, concerts, and nights out that an older man might be too depleted or drained for. In short, a young viewpoint is reviving!
Recommended reading: Why Dating in Your 30s Is So Much Better
3. Younger men have more passion
Older men typically have a lot of responsibilities. Perhaps a meaningful career, caring for their aging parents, or even children from a previous marriage. They, therefore, have very little time to indulge their passions and desires with you.
On the other hand, a younger man is typically free from those constraints, and they let you know this. When dating a younger man, prepare for the overload of passion, masculinity, and desire that they will have over you. Love is felt strongly in younger men, and being on the receiving end can be addictive.
4. He’ll admire and adore you
Is there anything that can lift an ego and bring pleasure more than a younger man being mesmerized by you? I don’t think so! Feeling loved by an alluring, handsome young man is immensely fascinating and beneficial to one’s soul.
He understands that you’ve been through a lot in your life, had your encounters, and dealt with your challenges. You don’t have to substantiate yourself to him or fight for his respect. He’s right there with it from the beginning. He also doesn’t feel intimidated by your freedom as he understands he needs to respect your individuality.
5. You’ll get a lot of encouragement and support
Younger men grew up in a different world, influenced by more role models of self-reliant, aspiring women. Odds are, he will not see your vocation aspirations as a weakness in your moral compass. In fact, he might even respect and support you because he needs a relationship in which he is not the sole provider of financial obligations.
The Cons of Dating A Younger Man
1. There are new things to learn
It’s not a massive issue if you’re dating a guy who is five years more youthful than you.
You’ll start to see major conflicts when the age difference is 10, 15, or 20 years. You may have different ideas about what constitutes a good relationship. Consider how the younger man you’re in a relationship with will not have the foggiest idea about the music, TV, or films you grew up with. He will not have a direct insight into the events and history you endured.
Dating in this modern age can be complicated if you come from a different generation. If you don’t share ideas and values on what comprises a good relationship or what constitutes things like cheating, your relationship is doomed to fail.
Each generation has its own set of values and norms. Although not having a common frame of reference isn’t a problem for every loving couple, it is for many. Much depends on how much you derive from these experiences and how well-informed your date is about the past. Because of May-December, some couples have had trouble connecting outside the bedsheets, causing them to go their separate ways. No one but you has the power to decide how essential it is to have a shared history.
2. He may not be able to commit just yet
While you might be eager to get hitched, he may require a couple of years to make it there, which you can’t blame him for. On the off chance that this is something that surfaces in your relationship, ask yourself one simple thing: What’s more important to you? Formalizing a relationship or taking your chance with love and seeing where you both go?
3. There is likely to be some financial differences
Typically, the older partner has had a more prestigious profession, which frequently means they are better compensated than the younger partner. Since you have more monetary assets, you will have to help pay and start to take the lead on occasion while dating a younger man, just as men have done for women for centuries.
However, it really shouldn’t matter, right? If you are happy with each other and enjoy each other’s company, then money should come second. But a difference in income does create a power inequality, which could impact the way you interact with each other. Power inequalities can come with a lot of insecurity and misplaced anger, so make sure to address the problem when it does come up.
But if you’re looking for an equivalent match and believe that a man should pay half of everything, dating down may not be the best option for you.
4. You’re at different points in your life with different priorities
The lack of common life priorities may be the most divisive factor between two people. You might want to get to know your man better and enjoy the results of your great labor. If, on the other hand, he’s only discovering his passion in life or his career is just taking off, he’ll likely avoid setting down roots. On the off chance that a lot of your man’s friends are like him—youthful and single, going out to bars until 4 a.m., drinking, flirting with ladies, and acting like a college kid—you could be in for some trouble. So don’t be shocked if he prefers hanging with his bros rather than being with you building your relationship.
Another point of disagreement is the involvement of kids. Your body clock might be ticking. However, he may require some time before he can play the father. This is most definitely an unmitigated catastrophe that reflects different life goals. In these situations, one person will be required to negotiate, which is not the ideal situation. This can result in a crack and the severance of an otherwise good relationship.
5. Your family and friends might not be supportive
When there is a significant age gap, you will have problems with your friends and loved ones, both yours and his. Everyone may not embrace the May-December relationship. Your families may not support your relationship or understand your love. Furthermore, it can also be challenging to engage with each other’s friends. Although you and your partner can conquer any challenge, not everyone can, resulting in uncomfortable social situations.
To conclude, age isn’t as critical as similarity when you’re in love. When two people discover the love they want, the years between them become irrelevant. So search for your ideal partner now at TrulyFilipino!